Not Enough Parachutes Skit

4 scouts
Pilot, President, Scout, Smartest Man in the World

line up 4 chairs in a column sideways to the audience. These are the seats on the plane. Pilot stands by the plane.

scouts should sit with scout in back, then smart man, then president, then pilot in front.

Pilot: (to arriving passenger) Good afternoon. Please tell me who you are so I can cross-check our passenger list.
President: (quite importantly) I am the President of the United States.
Pilot: Welcome aboard, Mr. President. Please take a seat.

Pilot: (to arriving passenger) Good afternoon. Please tell me who you are so I can cross-check our passenger list.
Smart Man: (very importantly) I am the Smartest Man in the World. I've just been awarded this wonderful 'Smart Guy' award and I'm heading to my laboratory to think about important things.
Pilot: Welcome aboard, sir. Please take a seat.

Pilot: (to arriving passenger) Good afternoon. Please tell me who you are so I can cross-check our passenger list.
Person: I am a Scout on my way to [make up something specific for your group].
Pilot: Welcome aboard. Please take a seat.

Pilot: (takes seat in cockpit) This is your pilot. We are cleared for take-off. Please buckle your seatbelts and enjoy the ride.
(plane takes off and everyone looks out the windows for a few seconds.)
Pilot: (looks nervously at controls. Taps instruments, then addresses passengers) I'm sorry to report that we have a major malfunction. The plane is losing altitude and we will crash in 2 minutes. We will need to parachute to safety. Please follow me.
(as he walks to rear of plane, president, smartest man, and scout fall in behind him.)
(pilot counts parachutes and addresses passengers.)
Pilot: I have more bad news. We only have 3 parachutes.
President: (pushing past pilot to rear and grabbing a parachute) I am the President! My country needs me! (and he jumps out)
Smart Man: (pushing past pilot to rear and grabbing a parachute) I am the world's Smartest Man! I must live so I can do important things! (and he jumps out)
Pilot: (to scout) Well, there's only one chute left. You take it. I guess the pilot will go down with his ship.
Scout : Actually, there are 2 chutes left.
Pilot: Really? How is that possible?
Scout : Well, the Smartest Man in the World just jumped out with my knapsack!