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Halloween Joke

Scout 1: What do zombies serve at tea?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Lady fingers.

Scout 1: What is the one thing that can harm Super-Mummy?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Crypt-onite

Scout 1: What do ghosts need before they can scare people?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: A Haunting license.

Scout 1: Why did the Invisible Man forfeit the boxing match?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Because he was a no-show.

Scout 1: Why did the mummy miss the party?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Because she was all wrapped up in her work.

Scout 1: Why did the ghoul bury the trophy?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Because she wanted it engraved.

Scout 1: How did the corpse get out of the coffin?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: It wormed its way free.

Scout 1: What position did the ghost play in the baseball game?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Fright Field

Scout 1: Why was the archeologist crying?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Because he wanted his Mummy.

Scout 1: What kind of a ship does a vampire sail?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: A blood vessel.

Scout 1: What do you call a magic competition among witches?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: A spelling bee.

Scout 1: What has fur, howls at the moon, and is easy to clean?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: A Wash-and-Werewolf.

Scout 1: Who do monsters buy their cookies from?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: The Ghoul Scouts.

Scout 1: Why aren't ghosts allowed in beauty parlors?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Because they're too hair-raising.

Scout 1: Where do monsters swim?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: In Lake Eerie.

Scout 1: What did the ghost's mother say to her son on Halloween night?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: You be scareful out there tonight.

Scout 1: Why couldn't Frankenstein dance?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: He had two left feet.

Scout 1: What did the ghouls eat at the barbecue?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Handburgers and hot dogs.

Scout 1: What do grave robbers wear in the rain?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: ghoul-oshes.

Scout 1: What do you say to a ghost with three heads?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Hello, Hello, Hello

Scout 1: What did the little boy ghost eat for lunch?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: a Booloney sandwich.

Scout 1: On which kind of street do ghosts live?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: a Dead End

Scout 1: Who does a ghost love?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: His ghoul friend.

Scout 1: What do you call a witch in poison ivy?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: An Itchy Witchy

Scout 1: Who are the werewolves relatives?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: the Whatwolves and the Whenwolves.

Scout 1: What kind of pet does Dracula have?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: a blood hound.

Scout 1: What kind of hotdogs to ghosts like best?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Halloweiners

Scout 1: What do you call serious rocks?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: Grave Stones

Scout 1: Why did the witch stand up in front of the audience?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: to give a Screech.

Scout 1: Why did the vampire stop working for 15 minutes?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: it was his coffin break.

Scout 1: Why did Frankenstein's mail rattle?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: it was a chain letter

Scout 1: Why did the vampire get heartburn at lunch?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: He ate a steak sandwich

Scout 1: What instrument does a skeleton play in the band?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: a tromBONE.

Scout 1: What is a vampire's favorite holiday?
Scout 2: I don't know.
Scout 1: FANGSgiving.

Q: Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A: Dayscare centers
Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
A: His ghoul friend.
Q: What monster flies his kite in a rain storm?
A: Benjamin Frankenstein
Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A: Ice Scream
Q: What's a monster's favorite play?
A: Romeo and Ghouliet
Q: What do witches put on their hair?
A: Scare spray
Q: What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
A: Bamboo
Q: What's a haunted chicken?
A: A poultry-geist
Q: How can you tell when you're in bed with Count Dracula?
A: He has a big D on his pajamas
Q: What's pink and gray and wrinkly and old and belongs to Grandpa monster?
A: Grandma monster
Q: What kind of mistakes do spooks make?
A: Boo boos
Q: Why do mummies make excellent spies?
A: They're good at keeping things under wraps
Q: What kind of cereal do monsters eat?
A: Ghost-Toasties
Q: What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?
A: A wash and wear wolf
Q: What's the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car?
A: They boo-kle their seatbelts
Q: What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
A: Count Duckula
Q: Why are monsters huge and hairy and ugly?
A: Because if they were small and round and smooth they'd be M&Ms
Q: Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
A: Because everyone was a goblin!
Q: How did the ghost patch his sheet?
A: With a pumpkin patch.
Q: What do the birds sing on Halloween?
A: Twick or Tweet
Q: What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
A: Tombstones
Q: Why should a skeleton drink 10 glasses of milk a day?
A: It's good for the bones
Q: What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
A: White Pillowcases
Q: What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
A: Squash
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game?
A: Their bats flew away
Q: What was the witches favorite subject in school?
A: Spelling
Q: What does a vampire fear most?
A: Tooth decay
Q: Where did the vampire open his savings account?
A: At a blood bank
Q: Where do mummies go for a swim?
A: To the dead sea
Q: Where does Dracula water ski?
A: On Lake Erie
Q: What kind of boat pulls Dracula when he water skis?
A: A blood vessel
Q: What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A: Pumpkin Pi
Q: Why are there fences around cemeteries?
A: Because people are dying to get in.
Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn't have the guts.
Q: How does the silly witch know what time it is?
A: She looks at her witch-watch.
Q: What did the Mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
A: Don't spook until your spooken to.
Q: Why do ghouls and demons hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghoul's best friend!
Q: Why don't witches like to ride their brooms when they're angry?
A: They're afraid of flying off the handle!

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